Heyward is so good that.......

[aminors]

..if he pisses in your cheerios, you thank him and eat them.

Ant

 

[HPC]

Chuck Norris once ate three 72oz steaks in an hour.

He spent the first 45 minutes having sex with his waitress.

 

[cwells46]

Chuck Norris counted to infinity...............................Twice

 

[kdailey4315]

He once had an awkward moment, just to see how it feels.

He lives vicariously through himself.

If he we’re to give you directions, you would never get lost. And you’d arrive at least 5 minutes early.

Jason Heyward doesn't always drink beer, but when he does.....

Stay thirsty my friends

 

[leatherman]

He once had an awkward moment, just to see how it feels.

He lives vicariously through himself.

If he we’re to give you directions, you would never get lost. And you’d arrive at least 5 minutes early.

Jason Heyward doesn't always drink beer, but when he does.....

Stay thirsty my friends

[youtube:1zo3ew92]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G92nvHGqON8[/youtube:1zo3ew92]

 

[tommyfro21]

One day, Jason Heyward walked into a convent and had his way with all of the nuns. Years later, their children were known as the 1972 Miami Dolphins.

 

[HPC]

When normal people get hungry, they go to their refrigerator.

When Chuck Norris gets hungry, he goes to the orphange

 

[MartinFFcollector]

....Topps is changing their slogan to " The exclusive MLB Heyward card maker".

....he will play 2 positions at the same time next season.

....BGS slabs all of his cards as 10, as they're scared.

....he was blowing a bubble in the batting cage when a wild ball hit it and he got a HR.

....They dont test him for PED's. They test PED's for Heyward.

.... The ATL is now known as J-HEY

....the ball slows as it gets closer to him from fear.

 

[Hallsgator]

Jason Heyward doesn't hit the ball. The ball flies away in fear of the Heyward.

 

[THECARDFATHER]

....Topps is changing their slogan to " The exclusive MLB Heyward card maker".

....he will play 2 positions at the same time next season.

....BGS slabs all of his cards as 10, as they're scared.

....he was blowing a bubble in the batting cage when a wild ball hit it and he got a HR.

....They dont test him for PED's. They test PED's for Heyward.

.... The ATL is now known as J-HEY

....the ball slows as it gets closer to him from fear.

instant classic.

 

[teachervido]

Chuck Norris is Wossa

 

[DRav87]

-Chuck Norris mistakenly sent Jesus a birthday card on Dec. 25. Jesus was too scared to correct Chuck Norris and to this day Dec. 25 is known as Jesus's birthday.

-There is no such thing as lesbians, just women who don't like Chuck Norris

-Chuck Norris doesn't sleep, he waits

 

[ChasHawk]

-Chuck Norris mistakenly sent Jesus a birthday card on Dec. 25. Jesus was too scared to correct Chuck Norris and to this day Dec. 25 is known as Jesus's birthday.

-There is no such thing as lesbians, just women who Chuck Norris doesn't like.

-Chuck Norris doesn't sleep, he waits

Fixed

And the last part = hilarious

 

[jbone17]

Here is some good chuck jokes:

- When the boogeyman goes to sleep at night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris
- Chuck Norris can unscramble an egg
- Chuck took a vacation to the ****** Islands and when he came back the were simply "The Islands."
- Chuck Norris can divide by zero

 

[ChasHawk]

In fine print on the last page of the Guinness Book of World Records it notes that all world records are held by Jason Heyward,
and those listed in the book are simply the closest anyone else has ever gotten.

 

[jeff152380]

I want to see him start to hit for power.... he hasnt lived up to his power potential yet.... should of hit 30-40 hrs in minors with that frame and pitch selection....... not going to call him a bust... just going to say a lot of people are getting to high on him and are most likely going to be let down.....

 

[aaron41984]

I want to see him start to hit for power.... he hasnt lived up to his power potential yet.... should of hit 30-40 hrs in minors with that frame and pitch selection....... not going to call him a bust... just going to say a lot of people are getting to high on him and are most likely going to be let down.....

Wow! I love it! What prospect hasn't been hyped only to be a letdown other than Pujols? I mean every player has gone waywaywyaywyaywyayway up only to fall. Most recently... Longo. His base Chrome Auto peaked at what $250+, now you can't sell one for $150, and he is still a great player. It's just life in this biz. Know when to hold em, know when to fold em or just f-in collect em!

 

[scotty21690]

I want to see him start to hit for power.... he hasnt lived up to his power potential yet.... should of hit 30-40 hrs in minors with that frame and pitch selection....... not going to call him a bust... just going to say a lot of people are getting to high on him and are most likely going to be let down.....

Someone doesn't know how to make a huge profit off of a prospect LOL!

 

[ajbraves25]

We could tell if Chuck was on here. Chuck Norris' keyboard only types in ALL CAPS.

Chuck Norris doesn't type, he just says words out loud and they show up on the Internet.

:lol: :lol:

I have looked at this thread twice now and I have busted out laughing both times. That is great.

Thanked

~AJ

EDIT: I just got to the third page and I am laughing really hard, but have to be quiet. My better half is asleep. Great stuff as always.. Thanks to all

~AJ

 

[jeff152380]

I had over 30 chrome auto and still have 19 Chromes autos.. 10 are bgs 9.5/10.... ive made plenty off this hype.. but im saying there is going to be a huge let down...... just watch